Right at the start of our personal resilience alphabet we explored the value of acceptance and adaptability. We are back on a similar theme today. At the start of this period there was a sudden and significant change of gear for everyone. For some that included managing more than one job at work, managing school at home, and adjustments that had to be made to accommodate a new way of living our lives in a whole host of ways.
In order to manage this need for extra capacity and extra workload, we have had to simply let go of some aspects of life in order to avoid overload and rebalance the priorities, and how these priorities have changed over the last few weeks!
I wonder if you have readily let go of the things that are not important at the moment, or if you are still trying to run to a routine that is no longer sustainable? Perhaps today would be a good day to take stock and ask yourself: “What do I need to let go of at this time?”, or more radically, “What do we need to let go of?” Whether that is a routine we normally adopt; or a thought pattern that is not useful right now, taking a moment to take stock and simply let some things go may help ease the pressure.
Take 10 minutes just for you today, to think about what you are trying to juggle just now, new activities and old, and see what you can let go of for the next few weeks. Also be aware of what new habits you are developing which may detract from your personal resilience and take firm steps to let go of these too. For example, one obvious one may be the amount of time you are spending absorbing news. So review your activity load and make wise choices about where you simply need to let it go.
The picture was taken in Italy on a walking holiday when after a shower of rain the muddy clay was an inch deep on the bottom of our boots. A friendly helper to the rescue!
I’ve been working as a professional coach for seven years and have come to recognise that when clients are ‘stuck’ a number of things may be happening!
(1) Being stuck is a feeling as well as a thought. What does being stuck feel like for you? What images does the word stuck conjure up for you?
(2) Being stuck may be completely unconscious.. I don’t know I’m stuck but I know things are not as I want them to be.
(3) Being stuck may be precisely what the feeling is immediately prior to a significant breakthrough. The stuckness can almost be like a labour pain (!!) – great when it’s over but part of the journey to success.
(4) Being stuck may be a feeling created by overload and the stress level of the situation simply leaves one unable to take the next step.
When recognised and confronted honestly (sometimes with another trusted person in a supportive but challenging environment) stuckness can be reframed from a Barrier to a Door just waiting to be pushed. The other side of stuckness is a great place to be!
So, what to do when you are stuck? Pay attention to the feeling and the thoughts associated with that feeling. Know that it is temporary – if you choose it to be. Know that one step at a time may be the way to go… and seek professional or informal support from someone who can be both supportive and challenging to help you get to the other side of stuckness. Someone who can be your best coach through the process.